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This morning we begin a new series, The No-Fear Factor. Whether people like to admit it or not, there are lots of things in this world that we are afraid of. I found a website this week that lists over 550 officially named phobias. Here are a few of my favorites: Abluto-phobia- Fear of washing or bathing. Allium-phobia- Fear of garlic. Baro-phobia- Fear of gravity. Biblio-phobia- Fear of books. Cali-gyne-phobia- Fear of beautiful women. Didaska-leino-phobia- Fear of going to school. Gamo-phobia- Fear of marriage. Hel-min-tho-phobia- Fear of being infested with worms. Homilo-phobia- Fear of sermons. Octo-phobia - Fear of the figure 8. Papa-phobia- Fear of the Pope. Pediculo-phobia- Fear of lice. Pelado-phobia- Fear of bald people. Phalacro-phobia- Fear of becoming bald. Obeso-phobia- Fear of gaining weight. Scoliono-phobia- Fear of school. Phobo-phobia- Fear of -phobias.
So, what are you afraid of? Three critical fears that we will talk about over the next few weeks are the fear that no one is listening, the fear of death, and finally, what I believe is the greatest fear we face, the fear of being unloved and alone. Today we’ll uncover the fear that we often face when we feel no one is listening. As I often do when I am preparing a talk, I took time this week to “Google”. I performed a web search using the words “need to be heard”. It was interesting the various articles that appeared. It seems everyone needs to be heard…According to the results of my brief research… Parents need to be heard Students need to be heard Abused children need to be heard Older people’s voices need to be heard Farmers need to be heard Programmers need to be heard Engineers’ need to be heard Diverse viewpoints need to be heard School Mascots need to be heard Little guys need to be heard People of color need to be heard The Gujarate survivors need to be heard Children need to be seen and not heard Women need to be heard Cats need to be heard Fathers, husbands need to be…never mind it’s never going to happen! We all need to be heard. I need to be heard. It’s a basic human need is to be heard. Listen to this brief poem by Psychologist and grief counselor Leslie Delp. * “I Need To Be Heard”* By Leslie Delp, Olivia’s House, New York
I need to be heard ... Please don't try to comfort me by telling me, "You'll be better in time." I need to be heard ... Please don't pacify me by trying to "top it" with a hurt of your own. I need to be heard ... Please don't look away when I mention that precious name! I need to be heard ... Can't there be anger among sadness and misery? I need to be heard ... Meet me where I am, and listen to me… Until I don't need to be heard, anymore. * quoted from http://www.rsdcrps.com/heard.html! We all want to be heard, especially when we are hurting. We all fear not being heard… Sometimes we wonder if anybody is listening and that is never more true that when it comes to our prayers. I think often there are two issues that we face when it comes to the fear of praying. And, yes, I believe that most people don’t pray or don’t pray often enough because they are afraid. Fear number one has to do with the whole issue of “prayer”. People don’t pray because they don’t really understand what prayer is or how to pray. Prayer is NOT meditation. There are lots of philosophies and religions out there that will tell you prayer is meditating. Sitting in a special position, contemplating space or “nothingness” is neither meditation nor prayer. Meditation means to actually ponder something, to focus one’s thoughts. Meditation is good especially when applied to God’s Word. We are told in the Book of Joshua to “Meditate on it [God’s Word] day and night so you may be sure to obey all that is written in it. Only then will you succeed.” (Joshua 1:8) But meditation is not prayer. Prayer is a conversation with God. It’s talking to God and letting God talk to you. Prayer is always directed to God. It’s talking to God. That can be pretty scary, especially if your view of God is already skewed. If you see God as the “Big Mean Guy Up There” or as someone who really is not concerned about you or your needs, or even worse, as Someone who is out to get you or is against you – if you see God that way it’s going to be pretty hard to talk to Him without being afraid. Along side the fear of actually talking to God is the fear that we won’t pray “right”. We somehow assume that there is some magic formula for prayer. Maybe we got this from the prayer books some of us were brought up with in church. Maybe we learned it as we were taught those cute little prayers as children… “Now I lay me down to sleep…” “God is good, God is great, thank you for this food…” Whatever the reason we are afraid or hesitant to pray because we’re not sure we will get it right. Even Jesus’ first followers had this problem, and they saw Jesus pray first hand. In the Gospel of Luke they came to Jesus and simply asked Him, “Lord, teach us to pray”(Luke 11:1). They needed help knowing how to pray. So often we don’t pray because we are afraid of God or afraid that we will not talk to God correctly. The second issue is even more critical, when we do pray we fear that God will not hear our prayers, let alone answer them. Have you ever prayed and than wondered if God was actually paying attention; if He was listening? Do you know that over 20 times in the Book of Psalms (the Bible’s “Prayer Book”) that the Psalmist asked God to listen? It’s as if the writer of the Psalm wanted to make sure God was really paying attention. “Answer me when I call” Psalm 4:1 “O LORD, hear me as I pray” Psalm 5:1 “Hear me, LORD” Psalm 30:10 “Hear my prayer, O LORD! Listen to my cries for help!” Psalm 39:12 “O God, listen to my cry! Hear my prayer!” Psalm 61:1 Sometimes we fail to pray because we just assume God will not answer. We are afraid nobody is listening, especially not God. Maybe you feel like King David, the writer of the twenty-second Psalm, “Every day I call to you, my God, but you do not answer. Every night you hear my voice, but I find no relief.” Psalm 22:2 Well this morning I want to assure you that God is listening, first by giving you some confidence from the God’s Word in the Psalms and then from Jesus’ own words. Here’s the point: God listens, Jesus hears. It doesn’t matter how big or small, how seemingly selfish, how personal – Jesus is there and He is listening! Listen to the Psalmists as they share their confidence in God’s ears! “The LORD hears his people when they call to him for help.” Psalm 34:17 Whenever you are in trouble, God hears. He’s waiting to help! “Lord; you hear my every sigh.” Psalm 38:9 God even hears your sighs, your weariness, when you feel like giving up. “Morning, noon, and night I plead aloud in my distress, and the LORD hears my voice.” Psalm 55:17 And when you can’t “get over it”, when your concern just won’t go away – God hears. “For the LORD hears the cries of his needy ones.” Psalm 69:33 When you have a need, God hears. When you realize just how much you need God’s help, He hears. “I love the LORD because he hears and answers my prayers.” Psalm 116:1 He hears. He answers. He shows His love my listening to us. The point: you may not feel like God is paying attention – but He is. God always listens! Are you afraid God isn’t listening? Relax, He hears. He listens. The answer goes back to our both issues we mentioned a few minutes ago: Our understanding of God and our understanding of prayer. Just remember – God hears! Isaiah 30:19 (NCV) reminds us, “The LORD will hear your crying, and he will comfort you. When he hears you, he will help you.” You can be confident that God hears, but you may not be as confident that you are praying right. There is a right way to pray…are you ready. The right way to pray is to simply pray! The right way to talk to God is start talking! It’s sort of like with our kids. Sometimes we’re just glad they’re still talking. It doesn’t matter what they are talking about – when they talk eventually we get at what’s really important to them. Start sharing with God. Share everything. Share anything. Share it all. Just start talking, Start praying. But you ask, what should I be praying about? Philippians 4:6 tells us to “pray about everything.” I know, you want to be more specific. Well, Jesus gave us a pattern (as we pray about everything) in Luke chapter eleven. (Luke 11:1-4) “Once Jesus was praying in a certain place. When he stopped praying, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray as John taught his disciples.” Jesus told them, “When you pray, say this: Father, let your name be kept holy. Let your kingdom come. Give us our bread day by day. Forgive us as we forgive everyone else. Don’t allow us to be tempted.” That’s pretty simple, pretty basic. While you are praying about everything remember these things… First, remember that you are talking to your Father. This is not a stranger you are addressing. It’s not some disassociated being in outer space. This is your Heavenly Father. He loves you like only a perfect Father loves you. And as that Father He wants to listen and answer your prayers. And as a perfect Father He knows exactly what you need even before you ask. He knows how to give you the things will help you and also say “no” to the things He knows will harm you. In either case, He is your perfect Heavenly Father and you can talk to Him like your Daddy. Romans 8:15-17 says it this way: “You should behave instead like God’s very own children, adopted into his family—calling him “Abba, dear Father.” For his Holy Spirit speaks to us deep in our hearts and tells us that we are God’s children. And since we are his children, we will share his treasures—for everything God gives to his Son, Christ, is ours, too.” That’s pretty powerful stuff. Everything God gives to Jesus He gives to us! And best of all we are His children. That word Abba is the Aramaic word “Daddy”. That’s how personal you can get when you talk to God. You can address Him as your Heavenly Father, Daddy. Now notice the five things Jesus tells us we should remember to pray about: (1) We should pray about our view of God. He says, “let your name be kept holy”. That doesn’t mean that God could ever stop being holy, it means that we are asking God to help us keep His name holy. Remember, holy means to be set apart for something special. When we pray we should make sure that we keep God in His proper place. He is God. He’s not the Cosmic Gift Giver. He’s not the Cosmic Killjoy either. He is God. And we should always give Him that special place in our lives by letting His name be Holy in our lives. (2) We should pray allowing God to be in charge of our prayers and our lives. Next, Jesus tells us to pray, “Let your kingdom come”. A kingdom always has a KING, a RULER and Jesus wants that position in our lives. Sure we may pray asking God to be ruler over everything – especially everything out there, but what He really wants is to be the RULER of your life. We’ve talked a great deal about making Jesus the LORD, the BOSS of our lives. Romans ten tells us in order to begin a real relationship with Jesus Christ we have to confess, to admit, that we will make Him Lord. This part of the prayer keeps that commitment in place. We are to tell God that we want Him to rule our lives and our prayers. The point here is that prayer is submitting ourselves to God and His will. Our prayers, then, are not so much about what we want, but letting Him know our needs and asking Him to do what is best for us. Our lives are to be God’s Kingdom – and we want His Kingdom in our hearts! (3) We should ask God to provide our needs as we need them. Notice it doesn’t say, LORD, give us our WANTS, but our needs: “Give us our bread day by day.” Also notice the timing. Jesus tells us we should ask God to provide WHEN we need something, not sooner, not later. This point about “daily bread” has come to mean a great deal to all of us here at FamilyFellowship. We have watched God provide over and over again, just in time. It happened again this week. A large bill came due this past Monday, several bills to be exact, and we needed over $3,000 to cover the expenses. Such a large amount is unusual for our infant church, but nonetheless it was all due. We knew that we had about $2,200 available for these needs, but that left us needing $800. What did we do, we simply began to pray: “God give us $800 to meet these needs. Give us our daily bread.” We kept praying. We didn’t panic, we simply prayed. Then Tuesday evening we stopped by the Post Office and inside our box was an envelope with a $1,000 check from a church in South Carolina. At first we didn’t even know who the church or Pastor was. There was no letter of explanation, just a check – a check for our daily bread – a check to meet the needs that we had at that hour. God wants us to trust Him. He wants us to bring our needs to Him in our prayers. He already knows what we need, but he wants us to ask because asking allows us to acknowledge that He’s listening and He can provide. (4) We should talk to Him about our relationships. Probably the biggest issue we have with other people is the issue of forgiveness. When we don’t practice forgiveness we build walls between people and between God and us. That’s why Jesus tells us to next pray about forgiveness. “Forgive us as we forgive everyone else.” I realize that the beginning of the phrase says “forgive us” and I understand that part of this is about asking God to help us deal with our sins against Him, but we also know that God has already forgiven our sins if we are His children, that’s what salvation is about. The key to this passage is about forgiving others. Maybe turning the verse around will make the point. “Lord, just as you forgive us – we want to forgive others.” Last week we talked about forgiving others based on how God forgives us, remember? “Forgive each other just as God forgave you in Christ.” (Ephesians 4:32 NCV) Part of our prayers should deal with forgiving others and talking to God about those we live with and deal with every day. That's our relationships. (5) Finally, God wants us to talk to Him about the trials we face every day. We are to pray, “Don’t allow us to be tempted”. The point is not that we won’t be tempted, but that we can avoid those temptations whenever possible. The word here for “tempted” is not a negative word, it simply means trials. It’s the same word that is used to speak of testing, proving something. Often we are tested or proved when tough times come. We are definitely tested when we are tempted to sin. But whether good or bad, there are LOTS of temptations and testing that can be avoided. I like to say it this way, “Lord, help me to learn the easy way the lessons You know I need to learn. Lord, don’t let me be a stubborn student in the school of hard knocks! Don’t lead me into testing unless it’s absolutely necessary.” One other point here… Often God is trying to lead us AWAY FROM temptations and we ignore His leadings and head straight into them anyway. Remember the last time you felt God telling you NOT to do something and you did it anyway. He was attempting to lead you away from trouble. Praying this prayer means we will follow God’s directions and avoid temptation! Again, God wants us to talk to Him about the things that tempt us and test us. Those are just as important to talk to Him about as our physical needs and daily bread. As a matter of fact – they are more important. Several weeks ago we used the analogy of a hand to illustrate how to deal with people who are angry with us. I hope that picture is helping you remember to keep an “open hand” toward others. (See When Home Feels Like A Battleship click here.) This morning I want to use our hands to remind us to pray! The first element of prayer is to put God in His proper place in our lives and prayers. We’ll use our thumb to represent putting God first because it’s the largest of our fingers. Now hold onto your index finger, that reminds us to pray for God’s Kingdom. We use our index finger to point at things, to point the way. When we pray for God’s Kingdom to come we are asking God to point the way and telling Him we will follow His leading. The middle finger is the longest finger and represents asking for our daily needs. A great portion of our prayers everyday is bringing our needs before God. Throughout the day I talk to God and most often it’s when I realize how needy I am. I need wisdom. I need strength. I need physical things. I need friends. So central to my prayer life is talking to God about my needs and acknowledging to God that I know He will meet my needs. The ring finger reminds me of relationships. Have I been forgiving toward those Jesus has brought into my life? I need to talk to God about those relationships. I also need to deal with the sins in my own life that are keeping me from a deeper relationship with God. And finally that little finger reminds me to ask God to protect me from and through the testing and temptations I will face each day. That little finger is the most vulnerable on my hand. I need to be careful and protect it. In the same way I need to be careful and accept God’s leadings AWAY FROM temptation if I am going to protect myself. I ask God to lead me away from temptation by following His leading! So there it is, right on your hand – a powerful way to know HOW TO PRAY. You don’t have to be afraid of God – He’s your perfect Heavenly Father. You don’t have to be afraid that God won’t hear; He’s just waiting for you to start talking. And you don’t have to be afraid how to pray – just pray and as you pray remember these five things we’ve put on your hand this morning. In closing, please know that the greatest prayer you can ever pray is a prayer of commitment and acceptance: accepting God’s forgiveness of your sins and committing to make Him the Lord, the Boss of your life. If you have yet to begin a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, He’s simply waiting for you to come to Him in prayer, accept Him and commit your life to Him. |
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(c) Paul Newell 2003 FamilyFellowship Church P.O. Box 465, Beaumont, CA 92223 |
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